Not scars on human skin, but scars on the skin of mother nature. This piece uses perfect diction, beautiful imagery, and strong evidence to show the reader the natural history of the Bristol Cliffs Wilderness Area.
Word choice is one of the most important factors in trying to get a point across. A lot more can be said with a more powerful word. If you use the word “impenetrability” it is a lot more powerful than just using the word “darkness”.
The impenetrability of the cave was horrifying.
The darkness of the cave was horrifying.
Not only is there a more sophisticated meaning to the sentence, you also will sound smarter. Elder knew this, he’s just as smart as I am. In the first paragraph he proves the smorgasbord that is his vocabulary to be multifarious. “Stiff leaves spangling in the lightest breeze.”
If he had used the infantile word “sparkle” instead of “spangle” this particular sentence would not have subjugated my interest. The spangling of the leaves alludes to the Star Spangled Banner, to which we pledge our allegiance. The symbol of the same country that decimated the forests, and leaving scars in the exact place this was written. By using the word spangling Elder has given an even deeper meaning to the already beautiful sentence.
Our most powerful sense is our vision. We rely on our sight to guide us more so than with any of the other senses. For this reason, it is imperative that when telling a story you must use imagery to paint the picture for the reader. Elder does this very well.
“Each evening, at this time of year, as light fades overhead, the foliage seems to glow even more brightly.”
The imagery used describes perfectly the phenomenon caused at sunset in the fall when the golden glow of the sun is just right to cause the golden glow of the leaves to intensify. This imagery shows a very special aspect of a very special season here.
Any time you are attempting to prove something, it needs to backed up by facts. Elder’s piece is filled to the brim with them. Every single thing he talks about he has some hard evidence to show that what he is saying is historically true.
“Between the Revolution and the Civil War Vermont had been the fastest growing state...... at the forefront of the industrial revolution...... whole communities of hill farmers headed for the midwest.”
I shortened the quote, but in the real version, it gives an accurate account of how the hills went from being profitable farmland that was being clearcut, to ghost towns where Mother Nature started to take over again. The historical accuracy amplified the meaning for me. If he had simply said, The hills have been clearcut and regrown many times blah blah blah. It wouldn’t have the same impact as legitimate, interesting facts. Its like eye candy for your brain.
In conclusion, the diction, imagery and historical evidence is what makes this piece powerful. The meaning is amplified and deepened, giving the reader a clear view of The Bristol Cliffs Wilderness Area.
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